An Open Letter to the one who broke my heart.

Hi, it has been months since the nerve-wrecking revelation came out,I tried to break free but it seems like there’s no way out.  I’ve been having nightmares ever since  I knew your mishaps , or is it even worthy to be called a mishap? I couldn’t consider breaking me as an unlucky accident , it is more like an unfortunate choice, I have been nothing but good to you but come to think of it… Have I really been good for you? For me hurting someone so badly means he or she deserves it , so maybe at some point I really did deserved it.

I forgave you a day after I knew you’re into someone new. You cried and told me she’s not worth the big news, I convinced myself that it is just one big mistake and that the pain would slowly fade away , we tried to move on and  live like we used to be, I laughed and smiled as if someone erased my memory , but then again when I am alone , I tend to cry almost too often on my own , if I were to inanimate how I lived after that I would draw monsters and demons all around , Depression and anxiety ate me up and I came to the point I don’t even want to wake up .

Tell me how could a woman forget that she is not enough , even after she gave you every thing she’s got, Tell me how could a woman cast all of her emotions out just to welcome you back with open arms? Tell me How could a woman bring her life back after she died after you big fat lie? How could she look at you the same after she read your exchange of I love you’s and good nights? How could she kiss you as she did before after seeing the lewd things you’ve done with another girl?

Honey I loved you and I still do but I am loving you now with all the shattered pieces that you’ve left me with , I don’t want to let you go ,call me crazy, selfish and mad but I won’t leave you alone. It is a god-damn choice for me to battle with my demons on my own. I know you’re trying and that’s okay it is more than enough for me to stay , don’t get me wrong and think that what you’re doing isn’t enough, it is . And I can see behind those glasses there is your eyes, they projected the guilt you’ve kept inside. If only I could wipe them all away and tell you everything’s gonna be okay.

I thought I forgave you when I hugged you back, but now I am facing the aftershock .

Months may be enough to ease the intensity of the pain , but it is not enough to cast the memories away.

Stay and love me that I wish, Be brave and hug me please give me a kiss.

Stay and love the broken woman I have become.

And I’ll stay and love the broken man that you are.

Make Up Products for Oily and Acne Prone Skin

I've tried a wide variety of products ever since I'm on my teenage years ,
I have to admit it took me quite some time to find products that would 
complement my skin type and my lazy personality.
Hope this set would help women that shares the same dilemma.

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1. Kanebo – BB Cream media ( shade 02 ) – If I were to be honest , this product only  have light to medium coverage, I won’t recommend this for people who wants to achieve a flawless finish , but this is a decent product , it has spf 35. PA +++ which is good and it also offers a dewy finish . I would advise you to have this on your table for your    “to-go” days , or when you want to sport a no make-up , make-up look.

pro’s : it doesn’t cake and it has a yellow under tone, it doesn’t irritate my skin as well.

con’s : light to medium coverage , you might need to “baon” some oil films or blotters with you since it won’t control oil that much.

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2.  Etude House – Precious Mineral BB Cream ( Perfect Fit on shade W24 ) – One thing I could say about this product is that it almost lasts FOREVER ! 60 g of this goes a long way , (the dirt marks left on the bottle serves a proof of its life span. Haha! ) I’ve been using this bottle for almost a year now  ( I’ve used the product years back ) and it seems like there’s a hundred pumps left! The coverage’s quite good as well , it is “buildable” it doesn’t cake and it smells really clean!It has spf 30/ PA++ and it works well with powder if you’re opting for a longer staying power .

pro’s : it is a good investment for its price if I’m not mistaken ( forgive me it’s been a while since my last etude visit ) this one ranges from 600php- 700php ,it lasts longer than other bb creams I’ve tried ( which is a lot! ) and i would recommend this for those who are new in using BB creams,  it doesn’t clog pores too!

con’s : I’m confused with the under tone , honestly for some reason my eyes don’t work well when it comes to the color of this product , seems like it has a grayish close to yellowish undertone . But it doesn’t bother me that much I have been using this since my college freshmen days, I should earn a loyalty award from etude house 🙂 .

3.  Etude House –  Zero Sebum Drying Powder : The name speaks for itself . I mainly use this for “baking” and this indeed for me is the epitome of “hulas proof ”  make up,  It doesn’t accentuate dry skin and even your pesky breakouts, it just simply absorb all the excess oil that you wouldn’t want to meddle in with your make up.

pro’s : It doesn’t cost much , as far as i know the price ranges from 400-500php for a 6g powder and a little of this goes a long way, when i use this I wouldn’t even have to blot for straight 8 hours and it looks better over time .

con’s : It only has one shade which is talc white ( turns translucent when applied ) , and it has a strong flowery fragrance , a no-no for those who doesn’t like fragrant products on their face , t’was okay for me though .

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4. L’OREAL – Mat Magique BB veil ( shade N2 Nude Ochre ) – I’m not a pressed powder kind of girl but I love this product since it feels so light in my skin as if I’m not wearing anything at all , I haven’t tried building this because a layer of this is enough paired with my Kanebo ( see # 1 ) or my etude house bb cream ( see # 2 ) I use this over my BB creams only when needed like if i really have an army of zits that I need to cover up or if I’m going on an event that requires the visibility of make up . As I’ve mentioned I rarely use pressed powders because I had a trauma of having a cake face before ( ugh! the horror ) but this , It doesn’t cake at all like NEVER! ( well as for me i guess ? )

can’t state my pro’s and con’s since for the nth time i rarely use this but on those rare occasions this product never failed me , and I’ve included this for those who loves using and carrying a pressed powder with them.

p.s : the coverage is really good to think that it’s just 300php or 400php?

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5. The Face Shop – BB Power Perfection Cushion ( shade V203 Natural Beige ) – I have been a fan of The Face shop Cushions since their first release , actually I just finished my 3rd set of Oil Control Water Cushion on V201 apricot beige  a month ago and as I opt to buy my 4th I saw this new cute pact ( it also comes with monsters inc.’s mike wazowski and Winnie the pooh ), I thought the product’s just the same with new cases but my assumption’s wrong , instead of the traditional CC cushions this one is actually a BB cream on a Cushion pact! I was hesitant to buy this at first but they offered a free refill and yes the Face Shop gals knows my weakness too well I love freebies + the case ( mickey ) is soooo cute I can’t just leave him behind.

Surprisingly this became my new favorite . I got the darkest shade which is V203 natural beige since BB and CC creams tend to be 5x lighter for Filipina skin and V203 is my perfect match . This product has spf 50 / PA +++ which is really great to help protect my skin from Mr. Sun , the formula compliments my skin I’ve been using this almost everyday since I bought it and so far my skin’s still not immune of its benefits , I oil up “yes”  but  after hours and hours of use only and the oil sets to be a good-looking kind of oil , it makes my skin looks healthy and glowing , I don’t have to use powder over this it just looks and feels like I have a 2nd layer of skin that doesn’t look like make up at all, I also love the smell of this product , It just smells so clean and fresh as if i just got out from the shower .

I bought this for 1,200php – 1500php? from The Face Shop , I believe the cute cases are just limited edition but i still see them at their boutiques when I pay my weekly visit.

Note :  Forgive me for the pricing, I tend to throw the receipts even before I reach our house after buying and I rarely remember numbers so after I spent my hard-earned cash I choose to forget how much it costs to spare me from feeling guilty on spending too much on make up. 🙂

hope it helps! send me your feedback though, I’m new at this, maybe I could learn from you too! ❤

-Eu 🙂